The Good, The Bad, and The Hilarious of Parenting

Moved To Self-Hosting Site — whatsupyournose.com

I have had an amazing time learning how to blog at wordpress and have decided to continue with my blog but on a self-hosted site which will give me more control.  I do hope that you will visit my parenting blog at whatsupyournose.com

I would love your continued support, comments, ideas, and suggestions.  See you there!


Are Those Horses or Cows?

I say ya’ll; I own a few chickens; I love a good piece of deer meat;  I have been down the dirt road to pick wild blackberries so my granny could make a fesh blackberry roll;

Blackberry fruits11

Blackberry fruits11 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I have drank from a water hose on a hot summer day, and I have teased the cows to make them mad.  As a matter of fact, the school I teach at and graduated from has “Camo Day” and cows across from it.  I pride myself in being a bit country.

However, I have failed as a country girl.  I have not passed along the country spirit to Fa.  The other night I drove to my mother’s house, and as we passed the cow field, Fa squealed and said, “Look Mom!  Look at that tall grass where the horses lived?”  Horses?  How can my daughter not tell the difference between horses and cows?  And tall grass?  That was clearly corn even in the moonlight.

I took a moment to explain the differences between cows and horses and between tall grass and cornstalks, and felt maybe with that explanation I had restored her “country” gene!  That was until we got out of the car at my mother’s house.

English: Cows in polish mountain (Masyw Śnieżn...

Country Cows.

When Fa opened the car door, her eyes grew big.  She ran to myside of the car and latched on to my arm, “MOMMY!  WHAT IS THAT?”  “What is what?” I said.  “THAT SOUND!  THAT SCRATCHING SOUND!  WHAT IS IT?”  I chuckled and told her it was the frogs, crickets, and other bugs singing the night time song.  I explained how beautiful it was.  She explained how creepy it was.

It made me kind of sad on two levels: first, I longed for those times out in the country catching fireflies with my cousins or eating strawberries out of Grandaddy’s garden.  Second, I am sorry that I can not give those amazing experiences to my children so that the night song is beautiful and not “creepy.”  I can only try to expose them to as much as possible and hope they develop an appreciation for the beauty of nature.

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9 Funny, Weird Words That My Kids Say

Sometimes what we think we are saying isn’t what we are really saying.  As an adult that can be rather embarrassing, but as a child, it is just so dang cute!!  Here is a list of several strange words my children have used:

1)whipper wipers — those things that clean your windshield when it is raining! AKA – windshield wipers

2)ice pickles — the flavored water we give kids on a hot day.  AKA – popsicles

3) couscous puffs — the chocolate balls of sugar that we feed our kids in the morning with milk.  AKA — Coco Puffs

4)capri suns — you may be thinking it is a drink, but in our house, capri suns are the short pants that you were in the spring because it is not hot enough for shorts but not cold enough for pants.  AKA – capris

5) ear confection — the pain that wakes a child in the middle of the night screaming and crying.  AKA — ear infection

6) bessert — the sweet treat after a meal.  AKA — dessert (to this day, my stepfather still asks for bessert.)

7) eagles — you may think an eagle is the bird that represents the U.S.A, but to my children, eagles are those annoying birds you find at the beach.  AKA– seagulls

8) plump — no, this isn’t what my children call me.  It is the stringy stuff in orange juice.  AKA — pulp (to this day, my 16 year old still ask for OJ with no plump)

9) strudelloop — the warm breakfast pastry with icing.  AKA — toaster strudel

Please make me laugh and leave some of the funny and weird words that your kids have used!


Summer Bucket List Update #3

A few weeks back I created a Summer Bucket List.  My hope was to slow down and enjoy this amazing time of year.  I wanted to give you an update —

Well, I tackled #3. Get My Faith Tattoo — I have a tattoo for the birth of my oldest daughter and now it is time for my to get one for my youngest daughter! And here it is: Tattoo on wrist done in black with Hebrew 11:1, the infinity sign, and the word faith.

This also ties in with #8. Make Sure To Do Something Just For Me — Right now I am leaning towards getting a pedi and also, hanging out by the pool without anyone around to watch! I have been wanting this tat for a while so it fits #8.

So far this summer I have completed #3 Get My Faith Tattoo, #6 Have A Cookout, #7 Make Something (kind of — I am just not very good at making things.  I do have another project in the works), #8 Make Sure To Do Something Just For Me, and #9 Eat Outside As Much As Possible.  Not bad!

Let me know how you are enjoying your summer!

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“You Are Going To Put What Up My Nozzle?”

WHOOOT WHOOOT!  I have been blogging for 6 months.  I started blogging way back on Feb. 5, 2012 starting off with a post about the birth of another cousin.  A month later I explained why I titled my blog What’s Up Your Nose!  Now on my 6 month blogaversary, I am going to share another funny story about what’s up your nose.

My youngest Fa developed a very unsightly wart on one of her fingers on her left hand.  Fa has an extreme aversion to doctors and begged me not to take her to the doctor for it.  So, I thought, “Hey, I can handle this.  I have the internet, and besides, it is just a wart.” 

So, I tried to duct tape that thing to death, but Fa wouldn’t keep the duct tape on it long enough for it to do anything.  I think she kind of liked that wart.  One day I told her to name it and keep it as a pet which she thought was hilarious, but secretly I think she did grow kind of attached to that thing. 

Well, after no luck with the duct tape, I broke down and bought an over-the counter freezing product.  It said it was safe for 4 year olds and up.  That night I explained to Fa what we were going to do in order to keep her from having to go to the doctors.  My thinking was she would coorperate because she DID NOT and I repeat DID NOT want to go to the doctors.  But noooooooo, she immediately had a melt down and started screaming and crying.

As she sat beside me screaming, I tried to read the directions to my husband so he could put that apparitus together.  One statement read, “Now place the white round piece in the nozzle.”

Fa fell out on the bed screaming even louder.  She sat straight up and said, “You are going to put what up my nozzle?  Please don’t put that in my nozzle.”  Well, the more she said nozzle in replace of nostril the harder I laughed.  The more I laughed the more she cried.  It took me a good 30 minutes to explain to her what a nozzle was and the difference between a nozzle and a nostril. 

Oh how she cracks me up.  So, see What’s Up Your Nose is very fitting.  Please browse some of my older post and enjoy my blog on my 6 month blogaversary! 

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1 Step To Prevent Allergies

Allergies are no joke.  That beautiful green grass, those lush fragrant flowers, and not to mention a half dozen other triggers that send you into a tornado of sneezing, puffy eyes, and runny nose are easily enjoyed by other, but millions of people suffer from allergies.  I suffer horribly from allergies including headaches, scratchy and swollen eyes, runny nose, and just plain miserable feeling.  My allergies usually trigger my asthma as well.  I have done the shots and that helped a lot, but now I rely mainly on avoiding triggers and benadryl.

Just like my grape juice preventive, my step to prevent allergies has not been proven through peer-reviewed scientific studies, and I am not a doctor.  However, there is anecdotal evidence that suggest if you eat 1 tablespoon of local honey a day to battle allergies you can decrease the severity and frequency of allergic episodes.  That’s it!

Med u saću

local honey (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It is thought that it works like a vaccine.  The idea is by eating a tablespoon of local honey a day gradually vaccinates the bodies against allergens.  This is a process called immunotherapy.   The honey has to be LOCAL!!  When I say local, I mean within a few miles of your house.  The closer the better because you will share the same type of plants.  It would be useless to try and treat your allergies in Maryland with honey from Mississippi.  By introducing the pollen spores from local plants into the body in small amounts by eating honey, the body  should become accustomed to the spores presence and decrease the chance of an immune system response.

It is important to note that bees don’t use all of the items that cause allergies.  Trees, grass, and weeds are not covered by this honey theory.  Also, honey itself can cause problems.  NEVER GIVE HONEY TO A CHILD YOUNGER THAN 2 because it can cause botulism which can be very serious.  Also, people do have allergies to honey, and finally, remember that honey has bacteria in it as well. 

So, weigh your options and decide if using honey to prevent allergies is a good option for you.


10 Incredible Reasons To Have Children

If I would have known then what I know now about having children ….

  1. I would never again go to the bathroom alone!
  2. SpongeBob SquarePants

    SpongeBob SquarePants (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

    I would come to think of Sponge Bob Squarepants, iCarly, and Good Luck Charlie as actual comedy.

  3. That staying up past 9:00 PM is a wild night.
  4. That chicken nuggets and french fries would qualify as a gourmet meal.
  5. That I would sing and clap when someone took a “poo-poo” — “You went poo-poo.  You did a doo-doo.  It makes me happy when you go poo-poo!” (Really, I sing that!)
  6. Sleeping past 7:00 AM is sleeping in.
  7. That Kids Bop and The Disney Channel would be jammin’.
  8. That macaroni necklaces are more precious than diamonds.
  9. That a birthday party for a 5 year old would be the most happening event of the year.
  10. That my life would never be mine again, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

I would do it all over again in a heartbeat.  I love my babies!


4 Major Differences Between Driving In The North And The South

My grandmother use to say, “Girl, I would go through hell with kerosine drawers on for you?”  Well, I felt like I did that for K a few weekends ago, when I drove to Quakertown, Pennsylvania to watch her play in a softball tournament.  I had forgotten there are some vital differences between the North and the South!

  1. First, the way the roads are laid out make no sense to me.  I could be traveling along in what I thought was a straight line only to find 6 differnt roads, intersections, highways, routes, etc. looming in front of me sending me into a full blown panic attack mumbling to myself, “There is no place like home.  There is no place like home.”  Another mother told me that in Pennsylvania they built the roads based on where the cows wondered!  I didn’t see any cows up there which would have probably provided me with some comfort if I had of seen them since I am from a more rural area, but obviously following the cows to build roads was not a very sound plan!
  2. Second, the tolls caught me by surprise.  We have tolls in Virginia, but when I pulled up to the first major toll booth with my standard .75 cents Virginia toll, the lady looked at me as if I was crazy!  As I sat smiling sweetly at her, she growled, “$4.00!”  I gasped, “Really! $4.00!”  “Really!  Could you please pay so we can move this along?”  This $4.00 toll was followed by a $6.00 toll, a $3.00 toll, and ended with a $2.45 toll.  Totaling $15.45 which could almost buy me a half a tank of gas which by the way is more expensive up north!
  3. Third, as I traveled through the heart of Washington D.C., which I didn’t want to do, but the GPS decided it was a good route, I had the pleasure of providing Fa with a basic understanding of urban living.  I answered such questions as: “Why are there so many people… buildings… cars… etc?”  “If there are so many cars, why do so many people walk?”   Is there any grass in the city?”   “Why are all of those people just sitting on the sidewalk or by the building?  They must like to shop a lot because they have tons of bags!”  Homelessness was the hardest to explain.  I don’t know if she could wrap her mind around it, but she did say,  “I sure hope they don’t get in the car with us and try to go to our HOME.”
  4. A typical speed limit sign in the United State...

    A typical speed limit sign in the United States showing a 50 mph restriction. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

    Finally, in the south the speed limit signs tend to be enforced making me cautious.  As I entered Pennsylvania, I was going my safe 5 miles over the speed limit — so 55=60, 65=70, etc.  In Pennsylvania, 55=85, 65=95.  NO KIDDING!  So, I moved over to the right lane, also known as the slow lane, since I was going so much slower than everyone else.  Only to see a sign that said, “Slower traffic keep left.”  By now, I was confused, tired, and done, but trying to follow the rules, I moved over to the left lane.  I was then bombarded with blowing horns and people shooting me the finger as they drove by.  Fa held up her middle finger and asked me what it meant.  I told her it must be how they waved Hi in Pennsylvania.  A few minutes later I looked in my rearview mirror to see FA giving everyone the finger!!

To end this story, at dinner I ordered a sweet tea only to be looked at as if I had 3 heads!  A dad of one of the girls on the softball team said, “Honey, sorry to tell you , but you are too far north for sweet tea!!”  I began to mumble, “There is no place like home!  There is no place like home!”

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1 Step To Prevent The Stomach Bug

Cleaning puke has to be the worst task a mother has to do.  Well, maybe there are a few others, but cleaning puke ranks right up there at the top.  However, the other day as I trolled the internet I read that drinking a glass of 100% grape juice a day can prevent the stomach bug!  Key word here — PREVENTIVE.  If you give it to someone who already has the stomach bug, you will be cleaning up purple puke!

So, your 1 step to preventing the stomach bug is GRAPE JUICE!

Now let’s explore this idea a bit more. 

  1. I am not a doctor, and I have not been able to find any science to actually back this up, but I have read several testimonies by “real” moms (opposed to the fake moms) that says it works.  I also read that it is the acidic level that prevents the stomach bug from surviving in the digestive tract. 
  2. The grape juice has to be 100% not a juice cocktail.  There was some mention of cranberry juice working too which is also great for those pesky UTIs.  It is recommend Welch’s 100% grape juice not the essiential or the calcuim fortified or the light or the white —  just straight grape juice!  I guess this could be a marketing ploy by Welch’s, but hey, if it works, I am all for it. 
  3. The recommendation is one glass daily until you start to hear the rumor that the stomach bug is going around and then up it to three glasses a day.  DO NOT GIVE IT TO SOMEONE THAT HAS THE STOMACH BUG ALREADY!
  4. Yes, grape juice has a lot of calories in it.  However, if you drink one glass a day at breakfast, it is a great way to start the day and you can find other places to cut a few calories.  I recommend eating a cup of yogurt each day too since it has probiotics which are also good for the gut and cutting out that cheeseburger for lunch.   Just a suggestion.

Well, I hope this tip works for you and your family and you remain bug free!!


Turning 6 — The Baby’s Birthday — A Mother’s Reflection (Again)

Birthdays are bittersweet for moms.  You want to celebrate the joy of the new life you helped bring into this world on that special day, but at the same time, you mourn that your babies are growing up and your role in life is changing.  Both of my beautiful daughters are born in July; so, while it is a joyous month, it is also a month in which I do a lot of reflection.

July 25, 2006 — I had been in labor for about 24 hours, and my doctor kept telling me I was experiencing Braxton-Hicks contractions because my contractions weren’t regular, but Ik new differently.  Finally, after a hot shower, my contractions started at 3 minutes apart regularly.  It happened so fast — Terry and my stepson drove me to the hospital at about 90 mph while I screamed.  They wheeled me into the labor and delivery room; I stood up; my water broke; and 45 minutes later she was here.  It happened so fast, and I experienced every second of her birth because I was too far along in labor to get the epideral and because I had been in labor (pain) for 24 hours I was slightly dehydrated and they couldn’t even get an IV to give me pain meds.  I think that is how Fa wanted it — she wanted me to experience every second.  Her way of saying, “Savour every minute — the good and the bad because life is too short to gloss over anything.”  This is still her approach to life 6 years later.

Fa is my youngest, and I still baby her way too much even though she will be 6, but it is hard to know that the “baby” phase of motherhood is almost over.  I cling to Fa because she represents for me all that is free and beautiful in this world.

After Terry and I had been married for two years, we decided we wanted a baby, and he really wanted a little girl.  I was 33 when the plan formed, and I clearly stated that if I wasn’t pregnant by the time I was 35 I wasn’t going to get pregnant simply because I didn’t want to be “too old.”   We tried for over a year with no luck.  I began seeing a specialist and began taking medication to help us along in the process.  One morning as I was praying, I asked for God’s will to be done.  I told him that I was going to turn this over to him, and if he wanted to bless us with a baby, he would and if he didn’t, then I would accept his decision.  I stopped taking the medicine, and two weeks later I was pregnant.  You may say it was the medicines that was still in my system, but I say it was God’s blessing!  Did I mention it was 4 months before my 35th birthday!?

I named my precious gift Linda Faith.  Linda is my mother’s name. I wanted to honor the woman who had stood by me and supported me and loved me through everything; I also wanted to honor God.  I named her Faith because without faith it is impossible to please God.  In the first verse of Hebrews it says, “Now Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”  And that is what my Faith is to me — the evidence of things not seen — love, hope, trust, etc.

Fa is the glue that holds this family together.  We have the “his,” “mine,” and “ours” syndrome going on.  Terry has Austin from his first marriage, and I have K from my ex.  In the beginning, it was easy to separate into teams — us against them, but after Fa came along, we bonded more as a family.  Austin and K have a sister that they share together, and let me tell you, Fa loves her Bubbie and her Sissy!!  Terry and I have Fa together which made us grow closer.  So, there is no longer the us against them — it is simply US!!

Fa is my spit-fire!  She is free-spirited and funny and creative.  She is everything I am not!  Sometimes I wish I could be more like her because she milks life for everything it is worth.  She reminds me to slow-down a bit, to laugh more, and to not take myself so seriously.  I love her immensely!!

I have a special song that I say is “our” song.  It is “Smile” by Uncle Kracker:


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